


like a bed of roses (there's a dozen reasons in this gun)

by Anonymous



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Episode: s01e02 Run Boy Run, F/M, Fade to Black, Fluff and Angst, Sharing a Bed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-13
Updated: 2019-06-13
Packaged: 2020-05-07 08:57:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,029
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19206094
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: “And you know what, it’s getting late, and I have lessons early, and I need to sleep, and I’m sure you do too.”Five scoffs, “I’m fifty-eight years old and in a place with real beds for the first time in decades. Younger body notwithstanding, I’m not sleeping on a couch.”“Then don’t,” Vanya says.





	like a bed of roses (there's a dozen reasons in this gun)

**Author's Note:**

> title from my chemical romance's demolition lovers ofc  
> a response to [this prompt](https://umbrellakink.dreamwidth.org/284.html?thread=955932)

“And you know what, it’s getting late, and I have lessons early, and I need to sleep, and I’m sure you do too.” 

Five scoffs, “I’m fifty-eight years old and in a place with real beds for the first time in decades. Younger body notwithstanding, I’m not sleeping on a couch.” 

“Then don’t,” Vanya says, eyes going wide at her own boldness as she turns away and heads into her room. It’s just an offer to share the bed, maybe cuddle if that, she tells herself. They’re not like Allison and Luther- she isn’t special. Five is, and it’s a grounding thought. It doesn’t matter how many insects flutter around her hollow rib cage, Five is _special_. 

She dry swallows two pills, and Five teleports into her room. He’s still taller than her, even if only by a little.

“You’ve changed.” 

“It’s been twenty years.” 

His lips quirk, “Before you would have just shaken your head.” 

She remembers the day he disappeared like it was yesterday, promised she wouldn’t stop herself from saying what she thought again. (She isn’t vain enough to think that saying ‘please don’t go’ would have changed Five leaving, or running after him, but it would have lessened the guilt on her silent shoulders.) 

“Stay. We’ll talk in the morning.” 

“Okay.” 

Five takes the side closer to the locked window, and Vanya takes the other, her tank top and shorts feeling inordinately immodest. (Five turned down an offer of pajamas, simply stripped down to his boxers, and Vanya shouldn’t be looking at his younger body like that, shouldn’t be looking at her brother at all like that.)

.

Vanya wakes up in the middle of the night, sweat slowly rolling down her back, heat racing up her front. Somehow she became spooned around Five, his hands on her wrists. Her thumb strokes whatever skin is nearest- that Five’s _real_ , that he actually came home and this isn’t all a fever dream, feels too good to be true. 

He stiffens in her arms, and she blearily wonders how long it’s been since he had human contact. It’s a depressing thought, and she pushes it away, resting her forehead on his shoulder and going back to sleep. 

.

Five’s still there in the morning, a hazy memory of cuddling coming back to her that she isn’t sure how true it is. He’s redressed and sitting up against the headboard, reading the paper. One that he must have left to get, and her belly warms that he returned. 

Which is silly. He already said the only reason he’s here is because she’s ordinary. She doesn’t matter and- 

“Where’s the best coffee around here?” 

“Griddy’s is still open.” 

“You would think nostalgia would make up for flavor.” 

Her cheeks burn, “I um, try to only drink tea now. With the meds, I shouldn’t.” 

“You’re still on those? What are they for?” 

She frowns, getting up and grabbing clothes to change into. She’s never gotten a complete answer from their father or Pogo, “Anxiety.” 

She does know they help, even if they tend to dull her senses. Vanya ignores the bathroom mirror’s reflection, keeping the door cracked the tiniest bit so she can hear him. 

Five hums, but doesn’t press. “You don’t believe me about the apocalypse.”

Buttoning up her shirt, and guiltily grateful that she isn’t facing him, she answers, “I believe that you believe it.” 

“That’s not good enough this time Vanya.” 

“Five, I want-” she starts, pushing the door open- but Five’s already gone. 

.

Her life becomes ordinary again, all too easily. She has three new students, two kids and one adult that won’t let go of the novelty of being an adult beginner, and Mr. Puddles sneaks into her apartment two mornings in a row. Vanya doesn’t know how the cat does it, is borderline convinced he has super powers. 

None of her siblings try to contact her, and it shouldn’t hurt. As Allison pointed out- it’s a two way street. And if she’s being honest with herself, there’s only one of them she really wants to talk to. Five would be rational about it- step one, isolate what you want to talk about. And that’s half the problem right there: she misses Five, there isn’t anything specific about it. 

Before, they shared a house so it was easy to-

Vanya feels sick to her stomach, can’t let that thought go on. She’s different now. She has to be. 

.

She’s walking home when she runs into the adult student, and she ought to start calling him Leonard in her head before she says the title out loud by mistake. 

He’s blathering about his wood shop, and Vanya wishes her rent were low enough to push him off on another violin teacher. 

“-anyways, I’m rambling heh. How would you like to go out to dinner? I promise I won’t expect easier homework.” 

“Ha, that’s-” she starts, eyes catching a familiar figure, “Five?” 

Five’s wearing the uniform again, and she needs to bring him clothes shopping for her sanity. He smirks, “Vanya, I was heading to your place.” 

Leonard smiles, patronizing, “Are you a student of Vanya’s too?

“He isn’t,” Vanya says before Five can verbally fillet him. “I’ll see you on Tuesday Leonard.” 

He doesn’t back away though, smiling. “Rain check on dinner?” 

Five’s arm is around her waist, his voice too cold for his face. “Vanya is busy indefinitely.” 

Five walks her away before her brain can catch up, only removing his arm once they’re in her apartment building. Her senses return then, saying, “What the hell was that?” 

“He’s unremarkable, you can do better.” 

She swallows, unlocking her door. “You’ve said I’m unremarkable.” 

Five frowns, “I don’t recall saying that.” 

The memory comes easy to her, Diego and Five chatting about which siblings would be best in a fight. Five’s words were true, but that didn’t make them hurt any less. Especially coming from the one person she thought she could confide in. (Or was that built up after he left, in his absence? But no, no it was real.)

“You’re my sister, I love you.” 

“I love you too. I’m glad- I’m glad you came by.”

Five settles at her table, opening up a backpack she hadn’t noticed. “The others won’t shut up. I can work on my equations here right?” 

“Of course. How many days are left?” 

Five meets her eyes, as if weighing her sincerity. “Two.” 

“Fuck. Is that including today?” 

Five nods, and Vanya clumsily sits. He flips back to his equations, and Vanya isn’t sure what to do with herself. Hearing the apocalypse could be so soon, it still sounds as crazy as it did before, but now it’s terrifying too. She’s never had a bucket list, doesn’t know what to spend the next thirty-odd hours doing besides waiting and panicking. 

Vanya looks up at Five doing his math, smiling at how his face still moves the same ways when he’s figuring out a difficult problem. The waiting doesn’t seem so bad, not right now anyways.

.

Around midnight Five gives up on his equations, and Vanya coaxes him to bed. 

“If you end up doing another time jump tomorrow, you’ll need your strength.” 

“You don’t understand, that won’t-” Five starts, stripping down. 

Vanya’s cheeks burn and she fluffs the pillows. “Explain in the morning.” 

Five mutters something under his breath about interfering busybodies, but gets in bed all the same. 

“If we’re cuddling again, you should be the little spoon.” 

“I- _what_?” Vanya sputters out. 

“I’m taller, it makes sense.” 

“I’m older,” Vanya shoots back. 

“Not mentally,” Five says with a grin that completely undermines his point. 

“Brat,” Vanya mumbles, turning on her side. 

“Older brat,” Five corrects, and she can feel his chuckle on her neck. His arms loop around her easily, and Vanya closes her eyes to feign sleep. She never wants to forget this feeling, and the thought that they could both- no only her, Five will jump out of time- that _she_ might be dead soon, twists her stomach into knots. 

She doesn’t intend to sleep, but she falls asleep all the same- too warm, too comfortable to stay awake. 

.

Vanya wakes before the sun, deja vu washing over her. Only this time the heat’s behind her instead of in front, and Five’s hands are low on her hips. He makes a soft sound, and she’s about to turn, when he rocks his hips forward- and _oh_. 

She doesn’t know how long it’s been going on, but she’s soaked, can smell herself. Fuck, she doesn’t even know the last time she was so turned on, the pills usually take care of any libido. 

“Five,” she says, can’t not wake him up. Even if- he’s her brother. That’s supposed to matter. (It didn’t for Allison and Luther, a voice whispers from the back of her mind and she hates it. Hates how very seductive and convincing it is.) 

He grinds up against her again, her shorts pushed up too high, air hitting her pussy. “Five!”

“Va-Vanya,” Five says with a loud yawn, jaw cracking. “What’s- oh fuck. Apologies I’ll-”

“Stay,” she interrupts quickly, before he can move his hands to jump. “It’s fine.” 

He exhales a half-laugh, “This isn’t gonna go away, gimme five minutes-” 

Vanya twists around in his arms, “I don’t want you to.” 

Five sucks in a breath, eyes darting down to her mouth. 

She licks her lips, “Look, this might be the last day and I- I want to know what it’s like. If you want to.” 

His eyes drag back up to hers, “You’ve never…?” 

“Not with _you_.” 

Five kisses her, kisses away every thought and the whole world. All that’s left is the two of them and a bed, pleasure and heat chasing each other all over her body. (He isn’t afraid to go rough enough so she can feel it, doesn’t ask questions.)

.

The apocalypse doesn’t happen that day. Or the next. Or the one after that. 

Five has covered her bedroom walls in scribbles, frustrated that he can’t figure it out. He insists on knowing what caused the pause- the commission won’t give up on an apocalypse he says.

“Maybe it’s you,” Vanya suggests one morning. 

“What.” 

“Well before, with the apocalypse, you weren’t here right? Maybe now that you’ve come back in time, you’re the difference in the equation.” 

Five’s eyes light up suddenly and he pops in front of her to place a swift kiss on her lips. “You’re a genius.” 

“I’m right?” 

Five laughs, jumping back over to his equations. “Not at all. But if I add a new variable, v for you, where I come back into the timeline, I can narrow down what or who v might be by which other equations it must effect.” 

It sounds like more, not less, possibilities- but Five is obviously excited and Vanya’s just happy the whole world ending thing is on hold. 

“Mhmm, wanna do Indian tonight? I’m craving some naan.” 

Five doesn’t look up, making notes all over the far wall, “Uh huh. Tell me when to pick it up.” 

.

One morning Vanya wakes to Five frowning at the daily paper rather than reading it. 

“What’s wrong?” 

“I can’t believe the commission hasn’t killed me. By all calculations, I stopped the apocalypse.” 

“Maybe their plans changed?” 

Five snorts, tossing the paper aside, “No.” 

The theory’s been nestling in her brain for a few days now, and honestly it’s one of the only reasons she can sleep peacefully at night. But if it’s wrong… 

She takes a deep breath, “You said they sent their top agents for you.” 

“Yes.” 

“They failed.” 

“Yes.” 

“Maybe they’re just waiting for you to die naturally, and then fix the timeline.”

Five looks at her, half aghast and half aroused, “That’s a horrifyingly perfect plan. You would have done well there.” 

“I couldn’t of,” Vanya protests, knowing it isn’t entirely true. If her family, if Five, was on the line- she understands why he joined them. 

“Destroyer of worlds,” he teases, nipping at her neck. Quickly her giggle turns into a moan, and there aren’t any more coherent thoughts or sentences all morning long.


End file.
